Monthly Archives: April 2011

A World Full of No


That’s where my children currently reside.  I feel like it’s all I ever say and I’m frankly shocked that it wasn’t at least one of their first words.  Eliza sometimes says nononono but I think she’s just making noise.  Jack shakes his head back and forth furiously, but so far, no ‘no’.

I try to make things less accessible so I can use that word less.  We tried to childproof.  Well, we’ve been trying to childproof but they keep finding ways around it.

I mistakenly believe that childproofing was going to be like decorating the nursery – once it was done, it was done.  Like that’s it, we’re childproofed – hooray!  But no, it’s ongoing and constantly being reworked to meet our needs.  It has to grow and change as they do.  It’s a continual attempt at outsmarting these kids and remaining one (very very small) step ahead of them at all times.  Honestly, it’s exhausting.  And the truth is, they quickly and easily find a way around whatever I do.

This morning, Jack figured out how to get up on the couch.  It really doesn’t sound like a big deal, but the top of the couch was our last spot to put things we didn’t want them touching.  Like the TV/DVD/cable remotes or our cell phones or the big overnight bag we use for them when they stay at my parents house.  Also, we put the wipes up there and the baby powder and the diapers and the mail…actually, maybe this new development will make the living room look much less cluttered.

It’s really hard to believe that in a few short years we’ll be able to get rid of the eight nine* -yes EIGHT NINE- baby gates we have to block off different areas of the house.  Our house isn’t even big enough to require that many gates. We won’t be able to get rid of all of them because of the dogs but we’ll be able to get rid of the majority.  But for now, they stay up because as determined as I am to keep them alive and safe, they seem to be equally determined to come up with new strategies to seriously injure themselves/each other.

Sometimes I really do wish I could just make two size 2T bubble wrap suits and be done with it. 😉

Bump on his forehead courtesy of our coffee table, pink paci stolen from his sister

*In the two days since I started this post, we had to add another gate to block them from getting into the upstairs bathroom.


Night #2


Both kids went right to sleep in their own rooms/cribs and slept straight through until almost 8 am!!! I’m so happy this is going well so far!

Moving Day!


Well for Eliza anyway.  Yesterday we finally moved the crib and dresser out of the shared nursery and separated the twins for the first time since their conception.  That sounds awfully dramatic, doesn’t it?  Truth is, I thought it would be incredibly dramatic and the first few minutes of separateness, we were wondering if anyone would get any sleep last night.

Her room looks awesome (I will post pictures as soon as the wall decor is up) and she and Jack had a great time playing in it.  They were so mesmerized by her chandelier, they took turns having me lift them up to touch it.  Then once it got dark, they watched the way the crystal made the light dance on the wall.  So did I, actually, because it was lovely.  Then Jack kept pulling the pillows off her chair and putting them back on.  I thought, just for a second, that bedtime might actually go smoothly.

Then I turned out the light.

Now I expected some crying from Eliza – after all, she was in a brand new room and she’s not a good sleeper anyway.  And she delivered.  She cried for about 10 minutes, during which time I went in, held her, kissed her, patted her back and told her we would be right downstairs.  I put her down and after a few little whimpers, she was asleep.

Jack, on the other hand, was inconsolable.  The nursery they shared had two cribs and a short, wide dresser.  The dresser fit better in Eliza’s room, plus it has a girlier feel to it, so we put it in her room and ordered Jack a new one, which hasn’t arrived yet.  So once we moved the dresser and her crib, the only thing left in Jack’s room was one lonely crib, which we moved to the spot where Eliza’s crib had been.  Jack is not good with change and he panicked.  And cried and cried.  I held him and rocked him and he shook and clung to me.  If I tried to put him down he cried and clung even harder.  It was a rough half hour or so.  I eventually left the room with him and rocked him until he calmed down.  The I put him down and he went to sleep.  For the entire night. 🙂

Actually, both of them pretty much slept right through.  Eliza woke for a minute but fell back asleep before I even got in to check on her.

Tonight, they are both fast asleep in their own rooms without so much as a whimper of protest. You would think they’d been sleeping in separate rooms their whole life.


Plaster is delicious!!


A few days ago, Eliza wriggled into the corner next to the couch and discovered if you pick at a plaster wall, it crumbles. And those crumbles must taste really good because I kept pulling plaster crumbles out of her mouth all day. We went through something similar with the dogs – they chewed huge holes in the wall and ate the plaster. It must be really yummy.

I spent the day yelling ‘yucky!’ and pulling her out of that corner. At one point, while I was making dinner, I heard something that definitely sounded like someone doing something they shouldn’t be doing. I got the ‘uh-oh’ feeling.  When I peeked in, I saw Eliza with a piece of trim in her hand that she’d just removed from the wall. It was almost a foot of trim which she very sweetly handed me when I came over to see what the hell was going on. Lovely.

So I tried to block the corner with a chair, thinking it will keep them out of trouble! Hahahahaha!!!

That really can’t be comfortable.

“Are they all yours?!?”


It was such a beautiful day today, I decided to get the kids out of the house and go to the park.  We have this great park near us.  It’s huge, with miles of walking trails, places to picnic, two enclosed dog parks, what will eventually be gardens, and a very nice, big playground.  The thing I like best about it is that there are lots of places to walk, but I never feel unsafe because everything is wide open and visible.  The only thing I don’t like about it is the goose poop, which is roughly the same size as cat poop, only imagine a really big litter box for like a hundred cats.  For anyone who doesn’t know, Canada Geese travel in huge flocks.  Or wait, groups of geese are called gaggles, right?  A gaggle of geese…Anyway, they land in the grass and shit all over the place.  Luckily, this only happens where there is grass – the playground is mulched and the walking trails are either paved or gravel and for the most part, we were able to avoid it.

So we went today and took a nice long walk and as we were headed to the playground, I ran into a friend who has twin girls who are only three weeks younger than my twins.  We took all the kids to the playground and let them swing and play.  Of course, chasing four one-year olds around a playground for 15 minutes was way more of a workout than the several mile walk I’d taken – I was actually out of breath only a few minutes into play time.

At one point, all the kids were getting ready to go on the swings and another mom came up to us with her young daughter and asked us if they were all ours.  She looked sort of wide-eyed and a little scared, which I thought was kind of funny.  Actually, we must have looked pretty funny surrounded by our little army of one-year olds. 🙂

I wish I had gotten some pictures, but I was so busy trying to keep my kids from eating mulch, stealing other kids’ toys/sippy cups, climbing up the slide, hugging other parents (stranger danger?  nah, not my kids.  My kids will cuddle up to anyone – friends, family, general contractors, carpet installers, random parents at the park…), and wandering off into the dog park that photos didn’t happen.  My friend, after quite a few attempts, did manage to get one picture of the four of them – Eliza was trying to walk off, her two girls were staring (maybe?) menacingly down at Jack and he was looking up like ‘help’.